How does “I can do it myself!” at three years old transmute into “Can you do it for me?” at thirteen?

At three I got reproached and pushed away for trying to help them perform a task. At thirteen I am implored to do it for them!

When they were little I thought I could surely cultivate this “do it myself” attitude into the formation of self-sufficient, self-actualized young adults.

But, now at thirteen and fourteen they’ve become helpless and dependent. And, they want me to do everything for them.

And, regretably, I do!

What has happened to them in that decade between three and thirteen?