The Blame Game


The kids are going through this phase where they want to blame their bad behavior on someone else. Usually, that someone else is their sibling.

“It’s her fault,” he says. “He made me do it,” she says.

“Kenzie made me hit her because she laughed at me!” says Kaleb.

“It’s Kaleb’s fault I pinched him because he wouldn’t stop talking!” says Kenzie.

It seems that neither accepts responsibility for their own bad behavior. It’s always the other one’s fault.

Sometimes, it’s outrageous, the blame they heap on one another.

BlameGameMe: “How did you do on your spelling test today?”
Kaleb: “I missed eight words…”
Me: “How come you missed so many. Didn’t you study?”
Kaleb: “It’s Kenzie’s fault because she kept making funny faces while I was studying my spelling words last night.”

Me: “Kenzie, I thought I told you to clean your room.”
Kenzie: “Well, Kaleb kept playing on his drums so I couldn’t.”
Me: “What does that have to do with….never mind. Just clean up your room.”

But, sometimes their bad behavior is my fault…

“If you hadn’t made me clean up my room then I could find my coat!”

“I can’t get to sleep because you didn’t scratch my back!”

“I don’t have anything to do because you won’t let me play on the iPad.”

While there seems to be plenty of blame to go around at our house, one person in our family never seems to receive her fair share of it. One day while I was driving the kids to school the following conversation ensued:

Me: “Kenzie, you’re getting bad grades on your school work because you don’t get it finished in class. You need to quit messing around and get your work finished at school. Why are you being so slow?
Kenzie: “I don’t know.”
Me: “Did you learn to be slow from me? Did you learn to be slow from Mom?”
Kaleb (quickly breaks into the conversation): “Mom’s not slow!”
Kenzie: “Mom IS NOT slow!”
Me: “How come you  guys defend Mom so adamantly but you don’t defend me?
Kenzie: “Because you are!”

I guess if you’re counting who gets the most, then it seems I’m winning the blame game in our family!

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